#AbolishIndianCasteSystem

Maha Kavi Bharatiyar once sang “Jaadhigal illayadi paapa”. This meant that “There are no castes, listen oh little child”. He tried to make the next generation free of discrimination based on caste. His intention behind addressing it to a little child also meant that even a child can understand there is no discrimination, why cant we Indians understand this. He awakened a lot of people through his contemporary and path breaking ideas. However we still have this devil amongst us.

What is the solution, I ask. Oh Spirit of Bharati, tell me what the remedy is?

The Spirit of Bharati whispered in my ears

“Caste is very much present! Caste there in the pulse and nerves of all Indians. Caste gives them pride. Caste system is necessary. Caste System cannot be killed.”

I was surprised to hear this.

The Spirit of Bharati goes on and says,

“Listen to what I am saying carefully. Caste exists. All castes exist. They all exist in me. I am a Sudra, I am a Vysya, I am a Brahmin, I am a Kshatriya. All castes are me. I am all castes.”

I was slightly confused.

The Spirit of Bharati further explains,

“When I serve my fellow Indians, I am a Sudra! 

When I make money for my family, I am a Vysya!

When I spread knowledge or chant the God’s name, I am a Brahmin!

When I defend the powerless I am a Kshatriya.”

And so said the Spirit of Bharati,

“I am all Indians, All Indians are me! I am all Castes, All castes are me!”

–Varun Mannava

 

 

 

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LIVIN’ – Tamil Web series

To tell you the truth, I had no idea what this series was about. I also had my doubts if I would sustain till the final episode of season 1 of LIVIN’.

The series has a feel-good vibe throughout all its 13 episodes. It starts on a very funny, casual yet ambitious and jolly note and slowly turns towards realistic and hard reality kind of ending.

The city of Chennai and its culture is a silent character in this series. Chennai is constant witness to its citizens who are beginning to live in together, who are living as freeloaders, who have fallen in love with AI based app, who have grown old yet refuse to mature with time, who prefer walking home rather than a ride after dinner, who smoke-up bong in their balconies, who do fake poses for their pre-wedding photo-shoot, who want to explore true freedom but are bound by traditions and societal pressure.

Chennai accepts all of them with open heart.

Credit goes to the director-writer-creator – Prabhuram Vyas for choosing such a lovely premise and cast. There is a healthy mix of pride and satire on almost all topics. Take caste and racist feelings for instance. High IQ gyan on movies, books keeps flowing every now and then too!

Kanna Ravi initially seems like a boy next door with wooden looks but his acting skills get highlighted when things get realistic towards final episodes. Talented yet confused kinda look.

Amrutha Srinivasan is pretty comfortable doing her role. When she looks straight at the camera, you cant help but notice her mild squint eyes, cute! Beauty with brains kinda look.

Naveen George Thomas provides comic relief effortlessly. He evokes thoughtful laughter more like ‘Big bang theory’ and not like ‘Lollu sabha’. He is super comfortable in any scenario, be it funny scenes or emotional. I don’t give a f*** about anything kinda look!

Most of the series’ (including the NETFLIX ones), have unnecessary fillers which occupy a considerable amount of time in an episode  but wind up doing nothing in the end. This series has those too, however those fillers gel with the plot so well that the audience cannot name them a filler. Again the credit goes to the writer. The locations chosen for the series are all classy too.

This series is so subtle yet complicated that it invokes a sense of restlessness in the viewer. You would want to wake up and start pursuing something you like. Could be a person who you want to move in with, could be your passion, could be new love after break-up!

Watch all 13 episodes on YouTube in one go. While the first 12 episodes last for around 10 mins each, the final episode lasts for 23 mins. Its less than 3 hour watch.

–Varun Mannava

livin

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Is the “Mani Ratnam Romance” still alive?

mouna-raagam.jpg

What is “Mani Ratnam Romance” ?

The latest movie directed by Mani Ratnam was “Kaatru Veliyidai”. Although this movie released in 2017, this was based in late 1990s. So technically his last movie on modern relationships was “OK Kanmani” back in 2015. It is a known thing that Mani Ratnam brings out the best on-screen romance in Indian Movies. Gautam Vasudev Menon comes next.

So what is “Mani Ratnam Romance” exactly?

Although every movie looks different, his bottom-line remains the same. The woman is quite strong, calm, patient, educated, introvert, ambitious. The woman has also gone through deep emotional trauma during her childhood or early adulthood. The Man is sweetly childish, chirpy, extrovert, pampered and at times moody and emotionally vulnerable. When such personalities meet there is a lot of energy transferred between these two. It is covered extensively in his movies.

Right from the first meeting, which is usually a silly blunder or an act of charity from the Man, to which the Woman reacts in a strong way (mostly because she misunderstands him). This sort of reaction from the Woman makes quite an impression on the Man and he becomes even more chirpy and mischievous in his quest for the Woman. What follows this pursuit is a string of intensely romantic situations covered extensively through duets and everyday life scenes. One specialty of Mani Ratnam is that he does not base his songs in some honeymoon locations. He keeps it as real as possible. This has a resonating effect in our daily life.

Whenever we (men) end up waiting for a special someone we are reminded of the Man in Mani Ratnam movies. Whenever we (men) see a special someone being mentally strong and looking naturally beautiful we are reminded of the Woman in Mani Ratnam movies. Whenever we (men) have to meet the parents of someone special we are reminded of the epic scenes from Mani Ratnam movies. Even when we are laying aimlessly in front of our special someone during a casual meeting we thank Mani Ratnam (in our minds) for teaching us how to be a natural romantic!

Is the “Mani Ratnam Romance” still alive?

No!

Well, there are many reasons.

#1 reason – WhatsApp / Social media.

Half the romance is transferred on to the 5 inch screen on the top of our palm. On social media there is no silly blunder because it would be considered stalking if you bump into someone unknowingly. On social media there is no real gauge of mental strength because we all project our best face forward through hashtags and proverbs as taglines for our selfies. Expression of intense romance gets diminished to kiss smileys and heart Gifs.

#2 reason – Nobody has time

In this mad rat race for money and fame, we end up doing many things that we actually don’t want or don’t like. So there is no quality time left with anyone these days. Even if one does have time it gets lost in traffic!

#3 reason – Ample choices

We live in a fast food world now. There are ample choices for us. Right from the smartphones to hospitals to movie theaters to friends to girlfriend/boyfriends, we have a lot of options and a lot of supply. We live in an era where we are never spoilt for choices. In such a generation its very difficult to expect loyalty. Even a casual fight may result in deep separation. Having too much choice is a bane sometimes. Of course its a boon when we get dumped for a stronger/ deeper reason.

Food for thought maybe? Dump the social media chats, meet your special someone directly, take them out on a date. Feel like a Mani Ratnam Movie Man (or) Woman in 2017 again!

–Varun Mannava

#DatingCoach

#IdealPickupArtist

 

 

 

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My chats with “Pavithra”

By Varun Mannava (Pub Reviewer & the Author of the *Bestseller book “Polite Pickup Lines in Indian Pubs” buy now on Amazon — CLICK HERE )

Who is Pavithra?

Why document my chats with her?

Why is it so important for the millennials to know?

Simple! Pavithra is every woman who has an honest opinion about the tectonic plates that are changing in the sphere of “Relationship”!

Why does it matter? It does at least to me! If I am in this sphere of pickup lines, dating and relationships, I need to be updated with what’s the latest in the scene.

I am going to throw a lot of jargons at you. You gotta tell me how many do you know already.

#1 Ghosting :

During the good old days of dating and relationships, according to Pavithra, “Men at least had the balls to call off a relationship. They would call you out for a special dinner, make you feel comfortable and then break it to you that it’s not working anymore.”

Pavithra is completely fine with this, at least she gets a decent closure. Then technology became quite advanced. Pavithra says “Whatsapp became the dumping ground for a lot of men! They would say, hey look, I don’t think we go along this way.” Still better!

Fast forward to 2016 – 17, Pavithra finds herself in unknown territory called “Ghosting”! This means men are no longer informing their girlfriends about their current status. They make believe women that that they are so deep in love with them and that they cannot live without them. 3 or 4 months into the relationship, they just disappear without any prior warnings or dumping dates! “How can they chicken out like that?” quizzes Pavithra!

Pavithra throws more jargons for Ghosting! “Gas Lighing, Love Bombing! They are all the same.” She seems to like the good old days of dating that eventually converted to engagement and then MARRIAGE.

You might be wondering why I mentioned the word MARRIAGE in all upper case?

Apparently Pavithra has more gyan on engagement and marriage too.

#2 Open Marriage:

“These days engagement is a joke. They put a ring on it! And then all hell breaks loose. Men start panicking and call off the engagement. So many of my friends have told me stories of engagements being called off” says Pavithra.

And talking about marriage, she asks me, “Have you heard about Open Marriages?” I am like nope. She then explains “Open marriage is something where the husband and wife really like each other and they live together, yet they can go see other men or women. Its an open relationship.”

Then I asked her ” Oh is it like the ‘House of Cards’ couple?”

“Exactly!!!!” she exclaims.

Then I get one level deeper to find out why men think how they think now. I say “We have been brought up in a culture where just B.A. or B.Sc. is not enough. Everyone wants to be in the top college. After they get into the best colleges, they want the best pay grades and not just any salary. Its the same thinking that has invaded the relationship space.”

Pavithra agrees “Yes, maybe you are right. Men are not just content with one girl. They think they have achieved one target. Hangout with that girl for a month and then move on to achieve a newer higher target just like they did in their career.”

So what’s the solution to this? Pavithra is clueless for now. Maybe she will come up with a solution the next time she chats up with me. Maybe she won’t.

We need to wait and watch. Till then ciao!

 

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Conversation Starters for online dating apps

By Varun Mannava (Pub Reviewer & the Author of the *Bestseller book “Polite Pickup Lines in Indian Pubs” buy now on Amazon — CLICK HERE )

Let’s be honest. We are in India. I wrote a book named “Polite Pickup Lines in Indian Pubs” and I got judged every time I informed that to a curious listener (except say 1% of them). So I am not going to spoil the scope and reach of this article by calling it pickup lines for online dating apps.

Just google “Conversation starters for Tinder” and you will see a million blogs on this topic. So how am I adding value to the already existing Gyan (knowledge) about how to impress the opposite sex?

I am going to give you just 2 basic tips on how to say whatever you truly feel like saying and still evoke a response. Yes! Oh, the bonus is, this works offline too!

Invoke the Universe! And how ?

When I mean universe, I assume you all know about the law of attraction! “Good thoughts attract good actions and results. Bad thoughts attract bad actions and results”. This is what the “Secret” says. However Buddha said the same thing 2500 years ago. But, the “Secret” is a lot cooler so the millennials follow that. Whatever your source may be, just follow the Universe and understand how it works.

Here’s how it works : You see a person on the online dating app and you really feel this person is the right one for you. After you have done some required research of course. I don’t care and I am not interested in how you are going to verify if everything written about the profile and the picture is 100% genuine or not. That’s your problem. Let’s proceed right on to my area of expertise. Invoking the Universe.

So once you have figured out that the person in the profile is the right match for you, take a few seconds to invoke some positive thoughts about your actions and consequences. One simple approach would be to say whatever you are going to say without any expectation of response in return. Even if it may or may not work in evoking a response, what it does for sure is not build anxiety in your “Mind” (Buddhists consider mind as the combination of Brain and Heart)! Why is it so necessary to keep your mind away from anxiety? Because you will be building castles of future and the more you build these castles, the more you are likely to be disappointed when there is a negative or no response from the person.

Wait patiently and the response will come. Ping!

Go the Cleopatra route

If you are not a believer in the Universe, which is 100% fine, I would suggest you take the Cleopatra route. Show off in a genuine way. That means don’t use someone else’s car / bike to pose for your profile pic. Show off with what you have. And combine this with a not too submissive approach while chatting. I am not asking you to hurt or ignore the person you are chatting with completely. But I am saying don’t give too much attention either! You don’t have to rush off chatting the same day. You will get more days to chat.

Obviously don’t compliment on the obvious features. The person would have heard it a thousand times. “Oh, you are so beautiful!” ; “Oh you have a great body” ; ya ya ya!! Rather construct a sentence around the compliment that engages a reply.  For example :

“Hey, you look great, but looks are not the only thing I am looking for!” sort of sentences…….

Read the profile and engage in the hobby talk if you like the person’s hobby but then again, don’t praise too much or let the person know you are head over heels with them too soon. Online chats (just like relationships) flourish when there is a constant feed of challenge. When challenge dies, the chat is no longer engaging.

Always keep a hook on to your conversations. Don’t overdo it but keep a healthy hook. That means you don’t ask questions where the only answer could be a “Yes” or a “No”!

Let me know how these 2 scenarios worked for you. Mail me at workaholicvarun@gmail.com!

 

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The “Macha” culture at Indian workplaces

By Varun Mannava (Pub Reviewer & the Author of the *Bestseller book “Polite Pickup Lines in Indian Pubs” buy now on Amazon — CLICK HERE )

There is a silent revolution of efficiency at Indian workplaces these days. Its not happening because the managers are becoming smarter or sterner. Its happening because the employees/ team members are realizing how to approach a fellow employee to get work done. Faster and better.

We all work in a company where more than half your workforce is in their early thirties or lesser. These people are realizing their careers. They are working hard for their living. They are not satisfied with mediocrity. They want more salaries. They want better work profiles. They want bigger cars. They want to party harder on weekends.

All this is fine. But have you observed how they work. How they get work done?

Lets take two employees interacting

Pluto : Ssup bro! Hows it going. |  Mars: Going on great macha, you say. How was your weekend?

Pluto: Nasty bro. woke up with a heavy hangover. This new place opened up. Crazy crowded. You should try it out. | Mars: Oh really? Where is it? Sure I would try it out next weekend.

Pluto: You did anything this weekend? | Mars: Nah just the usual. Lazed around in my room.

Pluto: Listen what do you know about this new process coming up? Need some heads-up so that I won’t be all bonkers when the launch meeting happens. | Mars: Hey man, looks like this process is going to land on your doorstep. Sure, I’ll walk you through over tea today evening.

Accordingly Mars brings Pluto upto speed on what the new process is about and obviously they get a good rapport even before the new area of work starts.

This is the Macha culture / bro culture or however you want to call it. This is gender neutral obviously.

This works majorly because you are not intimidating the other person with your formal approach. The more formal approach, the more doubt or insecurity or fear you create in the person you are approaching. The more informal your approach is, the person is less likely to feel threatened.

This bro culture need not necessarily be used with the persons who you already know. This works equally the same with someone who you speak for the first time, peer or senior. But you would keep it mild initially till you become tighter bros of course.

Mercury: Hey Gupiter, heard you are a veteran in this company. Also heard your a big cricket fan. Who’s your favorite player. | Gupiter: Haha, 4 years and you become a veteran in these times. Thanks Mercury. Nice meeting you too. X is my favorite player. What do you do.

See what I am talking about?

So have you tried the “Macha” culture yet at your workplace?

 

 

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The Dark Knight of Tennis

By Varun Mannava (Pub Reviewer & the Author of the *Bestseller book “Polite Pickup Lines in Indian Pubs” buy now on Amazon — CLICK HERE )

As the dream becomes a reality for Roger Federer and his millions of fans worldwide, I cannot stop but compare the return and rise of this great champion to Christopher Nolan’s portrayal of Bruce Wayne.

“Batman Begins”:

Bruce Wayne waits decades for justice to be delivered for his parents killings, however the convict who turns approver is set free midway through life sentence.

Roger Federer:

Reaches 2014 and 2015 Wimbledon finals, however he cannot get past Djokovic. The 8th Wimbledon title still eludes him.

“Batman Begins”:

Bruce Wayne comes prepared for this result. He carries a tiny revolver in his coat pocket. He cannot bear the fact that his parents’ killer is being set free. However before he shoots, the convict turned approver is shot by someone else.

Roger Federer:

He comes prepared for 2016, raises from a close quarter final match against Cilic after losing first 2 sets. However he needs to win 2 more matches for glory.

“Batman Begins”:

Bruce Wayne is happy, but he does not realize he had fallen. Rachel makes him realize how low he had fallen. He immediately leaves Gotham City and starts re-discovering true crime and true solutions to crime.

Roger Federer:

He is happy over the quarter final win but he literally slips and falls in the semi finals. He immediately leaves his current tennis tour and decides to take re-discovering and re-inventing tennis trip.

“Batman Begins”:

While the media indulged in all kinds of doubts and rumors about the disappearance of the billionaire, Bruce Wayne gets enlightened like the Buddha. He knows exactly how to fight crime and when. He gets back to Gotham City with a bang. He is a Vigilante!

Roger Federer:

While the media indulged in all kinds of doubts and rumors about the disappearance of the legendary tennis player, Federer gets enlightened like the Buddha. He knows exactly how to fight opponents and when. He gets back to  the Tennis tour with a bang. He is GOAT (Greatest Of All Time)!

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