Stand Up Comedy Wala Blog – I

Ok so, you might have heard about stand up comedy ya? This blog is a twist. I have a lot of comedy (comedy in my opinion) to be rolled out but I can’t do a stand up comedy video or open mic sessions yet. Maybe in the future, yes, who knows?

For now I have decided to express my comedy wala research through the best medium I am comfortable with. Blog. Writing.

Let’s start with the legendary Jennifer Lopez.[insert laughter]

She is nick-named “jLo”. Imagine if her name was Leila Lopez. Then what would she be called? “LeLo” [insert laughter]. Everyone, LeLo tonight! [insert laughter]

LeLo se yaad aaya (I remember about LeLo), a very entertaining and enlightening song. Laila Teri le legi [insert laughter]

“Dil Tera le legi, jaan Teri le legi, Imaan Tera le legi, oh Laila Teri le legi tu likhke le le ..”

Firstly, these are gangsters at lokhandwala or wadala or dosala, Mumbai..[insert laughter].. If they could actually write they would have joined BEST as Bus Conductors bro. How can they “likhke le le” bro. Think? [insert laughter]

Also I feel bollywood song lyrics have a lot of fillers.. because in the above song after “Dil Tera le legi”, they say “Jaan Teri le legi” .. isn’t it obvious ki “Dil de diya hai, Jaan tujhe denge” (another song).. come on already, even a small child in Mumbai knows after Dil its Jaan’s time to go.. yes? [insert laughter] Arithmetic progression.. Dil > Jaan > Waada! ..

But still, we listen to those unnecessary filler lyrics because we love fillers and we have a lot of free time, [insert laughter].. oh man how much we love fillers..

Filler se yaad aaya, Mirzapur, naam tho suna hoga, right?[insert laughter]

I was watching Nat Geo recently for the love watching something sensible post 11 pm . So Nat Geo loves lions and lion prides, maybe the owner is a Leo (sun sign and not Leo Dicaprio)? [insert laughter].

So I was watching this series on lions and they tell us how many times the male lion has intercourse with the female lion. It’s almost seconds worth of intercourse each time and then the lioness starts shooing the lion away[insert laughter]. This act goes on for many hours[insert laughter] .. yep .. 2 days later they go back to their normal life .. wow. See I put a filler before revealing you the actual filler.. writers I say [insert laughter].

So I was watching Nat Geo on TV where these lions/ lionesses etc are having fun, I am not [insert laughter]. Suddenly my partner walks across. She notices I am watching Nat Geo lions. She immediately says.. ” This reminds me of the old man in Mirzapur, who keeps watching lions mat” [insert laughter] !!

Well one cant deny what she said. But one cannot deny the fact that these lion and lionesses were fillers in such a tight series like Mirzapur no? [Claps]

Chalo ab Mirzapur se yaad aaya, what the f*** happened to those who watched Game of Thrones since 2010 or so? Because I didn’twatch it till 2018. So you loved Mirzapur? Then why did you take so much pain to watch game of thrones that too for so many seasons (British accent mate) [insert laughter]

Ho gaya na, Ned stark is Bablu bhaiya,[insert laughter] season 1 end he dies. Munna bhaiya is Tyrion Lannister, a womanizer and short in height but high on pride and alcohol [insert laughter]. Damn.. Guddu bhaiya is Jon snow, (you know nothing Jon snow wala) .. he literally knows nothing in season 1 [insert laughter] and that Gajgamini is Arya Stark? Come on.. Gajgamini is way cuter than Arya stark. No? I like Indian women btw[insert laughter].

Kaleen bhaiya is that unique piece who carries this copy cat series on his shoulders right (literally just with his neck movements) [insert laughter] ? Kaleen is cersei ? Hopefully they don’t make Kaleen bhaiya go on a walk of shame in season 3 [insert laughter].

I loved the widow politician in season 2 btw. This was Mirzapur ok?[insert laughter]

Last paragraph! I know you are enjoying reading this but my phone is dying, so I need to wrap my ‘Stand Up Comedy Wala Blog -1’ with the below few lines. Don’t worry I shall keep writing many more.

Ok so we started off with jLo and ended with Gajgamini. Hope you wasted lesser time in this ‘Stand Up Comedy Wala Blog-1’ than on those unlimited binge watching series on unlimited OTTs [insert laughter]. If no, I feel for you, really.[insert laughter].

I hope an Amazon Prime or Netflix employee is reading this and considering me as their creative writer for their next Genuine Desi series! [insert laughter]

Btw, .. Bus Conducter se yaad aaya “Thalaivaaaaa” .. coming up in episode 2… !!!

— Varun Gowtham Mannava [insert laughter]

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1 Response to Stand Up Comedy Wala Blog – I

  1. MD says:

    Loved it! XD

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